Letting Go

One of the biggest joys, as well as one of the greatest challenges, in my life has been my relationship with my daughter. It seemed from the beginning of her life she needed constant attention and care. As she grew older, the problems grew greater. Her teenage years have been some of the worst I have ever experienced, but at the same time I consider it all joy because of what I have learned through the struggle. Some of the most profound insights of my life have come because I was forced to look at the world in unusual ways in order to cope with her problems.

Being a good parent is difficult. You have to balance your need for control (which we often justify as "guidance") with the need to allow the child to learn their own lessons. I am between such a rock and a hard place with my daughter. Because of the traumas she has sufferend in the past few years, she is stuck. I have also felt stuck in my own life, waiting for her to resolve some of her issues and move on.

It is only recently that I have sought the more Divine guidance of the spirit world in this matter. As I enquire within and listen to the voices of Saul and company, I hear several different pieces of advice. The first is to talk to my sister, who has had similar problems with her own daughter. The second is to ask for her help. Typically, I am a very independent sort of person who hesitates to ask anyone for help. The third (and most important) is to let my daughter go.

There is a lot to letting my daughter go. The first thought that comes is that her life is ultimately about her, not about me. She had a job to do in helping me learn some truths, but that part of our journey together seems to be about over. The second thought is that I am, in a very real sense, still energetically clinging to my daughter when she needs to be set free. Thus, part of her current problem is me!

Learning to trust the advice of my guides is hard sometimes. I question my sanity on occasion. Still, their voices ring with a truth that is becoming increasingly difficult to ignore. I will let go of my daughter, and trust the Universe will catch her in the fall.